Self Confidence – Developing a Self Image for Confident Leadership

“It’s not how much you have that makes people look up to you, it’s who you are.”

~ Elvis Presley

Often life gives us what we ask, and that isn’t really what we want. When the struggle of who you are becomes too much to carry, you may stumble and fall, but there’s an answer, greater than yourself, for those moments. You are created, unique, one of a kind, with the God given right to exist in the life that belongs exclusively to you. Claim the right to be yourself.

- An imperfect image

People often presume to reinvent us as we allow them to influence our “package” and tell us how we should be. But their image is imperfect, flawed and incorrect, since they don’t have the whole perception of our lives. Don’t allow the presumption of others to take away your ability to exist comfortably in the skin you were created to live within.

- Permission to be

When we allow others to guide us, as if we’re asking their permission to be ourselves, we open ourselves up to burdens we weren’t meant to carry. Unload your pack and stop worrying about how to please others. Learn to guide your own life with the principles and concepts of your own desires.

- Choose your path

Own the vehicle in which you travel. We’re all travelers along the road of life, but we don’t have to be passengers in a vehicle driven by others. We can drive our own lives, where we choose to go. The left fork or the right fork, choose for yourself, and take ownership of that choice. You can choose to do for others, but own that choice.

- Dare to be unique

Use the gifts you’re given and be the person you’re meant to be. When you stop pleasing others and start looking for your inner core strengths and desires, you often find the source of life there. You were born with gifts that grow and expand throughout your lifetime, gasp them and hold them close. Use them well.

- Understand what makes you happy

Some people are bubbly and exuberant, joyfully abandoning protocol to express their enthusiasm for life, others express themselves in quiet organized fashion. Allowing yourself to be comfortable within the self expression of your choice makes you feel happiest. Accept yourself and understand the ways you feel happiness.

- Turn off the control buttons

Others push your buttons and you react? Stop giving them control of your life. Choose to act instead of react and you’ll have greater control over what you do and who you associate with. The process is similar to a thermostat – set your own and maintain your own temperature, rather than acting as a thermometer and acknowledging every cold wind that blows.

- Choose to stand out

Have an opinion and be comfortable stating it. Even if it isn’t politically correct, you have a right to your own opinions. You have a unique voice and deserve to be heard. It’s okay not to agree with every concept that comes down the trail. You can acknowledge the opinions of others and still state what you believe too. It’s okay to disagree.

By acknowledging yourself and being authentic in your own skin, you allow others to choose their own direction and have convictions of their own. It’s okay to be different, to disagree and to stand up for what you believe. Nations were built on foundations such as this. Explore your source and express yourself.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this matter, I’d welcome your input. Come visit my blog and share your concept of life and opinions at http://janverhoeff.com/blog on topics of current interest.

© 2009 – http://janverhoeff.com

When I think of abundance there’s a feeling that washes over me of love and gratitude. No matter where I am or what I’m doing, I see this grand image of joy and energy that sweeps me away. That’s the kind of abundant joy that God provides once we understand the concept of faith. Until we understand how much faith applies to our lives, we can’t fully comprehend abundance. Faith so small as a mustard seed brings us all the greatness and grandeur of Heaven where the streets are paved with gold. What more could we attain if our faith was even greater?

Visit Jan Verhoeff and enjoy more abundance and faith. Leave a comment and remember, God’s in charge of your miracle, all you have to do is ask.

A long discussion about life can mean a lot of different things, or it can mean absolutely nothing. Most generally, it means I’m going to learn something.

People who leave your life, come into your life for a reason or a season. Some simply come into your life to show you that the cross you bear is light, compared to the ones in the other room. Today I experienced a cross bearing moment and realized how totally wonderful and awesome my children can be.

I’ve always believed that when the Master tunes the fiddle, it doesn’t matter who is playing the tune, it’s going to sound good. Today’s events proved once again that the Master is still in control and He knows how to tune the fiddle perfectly.

My son recently took up playing the fiddle and has learned a few choice notes along with the right way to stroke the horsehair on the strings. He rarely squeels, and his notes are fairly well drawn. I’m definitely not complaining about the way he plays.

As a lover of fine music, I must say the joy that comes as I listen to my children play various instruments runs deep into my soul. When the song happens to be one of my favorite (another child recently learned to play “Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain”) I’m just happier ‘n a fly on a hot summer day!

The lesson I learned today had little to do with playing music and everything to do with learning about life and growing up.

People who come into your life for a season limp along, teaching you little bits of something, often hanging onto your coat tails and lingering for what they can get from you. They often don’t offer you much in the way of gratitude and on those rare occasions that you do get something back from them, it’s tedious and costly effort that allows you to accept their gift. The season most generally ends on a sour note, costing you vivid anguish and great pain before they slip off into the sunset never to be heard from again. Or they meander in and out of your life, painfully reminding you that once up on a time they meant something to you, and  you should still feel something for them… Even if the feeling was never mutual.

On the other hand, those who linger in your life for a reason, show you something in the earliest period of life that you need to learn and proceed in one manner or another to teach you that lesson from that point forward. Perhaps not in a dedicated manner, but rather passively, allowing you to learn by way of mutual existence. In many cases, this person teaches you life lessons through a third party, with whom he has left all his wisdom.

Rarely is the third person aware he’s being used in such a way, and almost never is the lesson a great credit to the teacher. Rather the third person fulfills the instruction in a way that leaves the teacher visible and exposed.

Today’s lesson reminds me of a proverb, “Once burned, no longer plays with fire.” Which brought to mind another proverb about “she who drinketh too much wine, delivers spoiled fruit.”

“While I labored to provide for the heir of the vineyard the grapes rotted on the vine.”

~Annonymous

As a writer, I often write from personal experience. Though I seldom actually name my inspiration, there are those who recognize themselves among the words. There are others, less knowledgable about my craft who imagine themselves to be a greater inspiration than they truly are, and miss connect their lives with articles that had nothing to do with them specifically. Those people ocassionally recognize their own characteristics among the slackards and drunkards who become antagonists in my work. Little do they know, I wasn’t writing about them personally, but rather about low-quality characters of ill repute of which they remind themselves.

Those who believe themselves greater than they truly are often recognize dispicable characteristics they’d rather others didn’t know. In-laws and out-laws are among these.

Jan Verhoeff